Food Disorders - Why Do We Do It - Part Deux.

Yesterday, I talked about myself - as I tend to do here - and we looked at the labelling of food disorders. Not getting into each one individually, I believe the ideas and thoughts of people who deal with these labels are far more important than the label itself.

So why do we do it?

 

Now, I am not labelling myself a former anything - I was a hurt soul in a big confusing world.....and I loved the taste of commercially packaged, deep fried, processed, greasy foods that companies love to sell us. I used food - and it used me. I looked up what some of the precipitating factors are to most (if not all) food 'disorders.' Here's what I found;

 

 

(This compilation courtesy of caring.com)

 

1. Loneliness in all relationships
   a) Inability to experience intimacy

 

2. Presence of fear of authority figures or being controlled by another person
a) Difficulty in maintaining a "sense of self".

3. Possible history of abuse
a) Neglect of emotional needs
b) Verbal Abuse (overt or covert)
c) Sexual Abuse

4. Early "rejection" of the opposite sex

5 . If a male Compulsive Overeater, possible over-identification with mother
a) Over-involved emotionally

6. Tendency towards "Social Anxiety"
a) Tend to isolate and use food as a "friend"
b) After social situations, relieve anxiety by bingeing or overeating

7. A history of "diet failures"

8 . Preference for food instead of other activities
a) Food is friend
b) Food is hobby

9. History of Guilt/Shame
a) Parents used guilt as a form of control
b) Life filled with "shoulds", "oughts", "always" and "nevers"

10. Possible other addictions
a) Sugar
b) Prescription Drugs
c) Alcohol
d) Sex

11. A long-term, unhappy marriage or other significant relationship
a) Food becomes a point of intimacy instead of spouse
b) Food to cope with conflict
c) Food to fill a void

12. Long-standing relationship difficulties
a) Avoidance of conflict

13. Difficulty dealing with Anger
a) Internalization of anger
b) Ends in resentment

14. "Loving Heart" has been damaged (hurt)
a) The compassionate heart is buried, though still present

15. Hunger for acceptance and love

Can we relate to one, two or all of these? That is where we get serious with ourselves.

Now these are also reasons for other things people 'become addicted' do; gambling, sex, prescription medications, food, pornography, sodas, drugs, bad relationships (oh yes, you can be addicted to those too), alcohol....the list is endless. All of these have been labelled as things we can be addicted to.

Just remember, when it is an addiction to shoes, nylon stockings or getting tied up - it's a fetish.
See the difference? Me neither. ;)

Remember a few key things when dealing with any feelings (not food disorders - those come after we can't deal with the feelings);

• Get enough rest and expand positive relationships.
• Take deep breaths, close your eyes, picture yourself in a field or at a beach. Turn on quiet
  music; any method of relaxation helps.
• Begin an enjoyable task or project immediately after eating a meal.
• Carry food to work rather than buying it there. Pack healthy, satisfying food.
• Call a friend who knows about your problem and have him/her just listen.
• Learn your triggers, learn your danger zones.
• Work on your perfectionism. It’s okay to not be perfect about every external matter.

Oh...........and as always - rock your day!

Stress - Tell It To F*** Off!

Stress.

We hear the word and shoulders everywhere tighten up. No one wants to let stress in, or admit they already have done so. Stress is looked at these days kind of like the way we breathe in pollutants all day long and we say nothing. We just live with it - another pollutant.

Stress is a normal physical response to events that make you feel threatened or upset your balance in some way. When you sense danger – whether it’s real or imagined – the body's defenses kick into high gear in a rapid, automatic process known as the “fight-or-flight” reaction, or the stress response. Psychologist Connie Lillas uses a driving analogy to describe the three most common ways people respond when they’re overwhelmed by stress:

• Foot on the gas – An angry or agitated stress response. You’re heated, keyed up, overly emotional, and unable to sit still.
• Foot on the brake – A withdrawn or depressed stress response. You shut down, space out, and show very little energy or emotion.
• Foot on both – A tense and frozen stress response. You “freeze” under pressure and can’t do anything. You look paralyzed, but under the surface you’re extremely agitated.

I was always the 'foot on the gas' stressed out person. I could get it done if you just  got out of my way - and when I couldn't, I never quit just in case I could. It was irrational and ridiculous to even think I should have to stress myself over anything.

I remember back when I had to leave my house to go to work, the winter weather would make me nuts. I was stressed out every night going to bed wondering how the highway drive in to work would be the next day. I would play out scenarios about my husband and child in a car together - the 'worries' we create out of nothing are simply our silly selves creating unnecessary stress.

I was also the type of gal who never admitted to having stress.

First things first - we have to admit it.  We all have some elements of stress in our lives - it is how we deal with it that counts. If we find ourselves displaying behaviors as seen in the lists above, some adjustments are on the way. Everything can cause us to lose our ability to cope if we let it.

Our coping skills matter. Do you have innovative ways of dealing with stress? Share in the comments section.....and then tell stress to f*** off. ;)

Thanks to this website for the information!