Food Disorders - Why Do We Do It - Part Deux.

Yesterday, I talked about myself - as I tend to do here - and we looked at the labelling of food disorders. Not getting into each one individually, I believe the ideas and thoughts of people who deal with these labels are far more important than the label itself.

So why do we do it?

 

Now, I am not labelling myself a former anything - I was a hurt soul in a big confusing world.....and I loved the taste of commercially packaged, deep fried, processed, greasy foods that companies love to sell us. I used food - and it used me. I looked up what some of the precipitating factors are to most (if not all) food 'disorders.' Here's what I found;

 

 

(This compilation courtesy of caring.com)

 

1. Loneliness in all relationships
   a) Inability to experience intimacy

 

2. Presence of fear of authority figures or being controlled by another person
a) Difficulty in maintaining a "sense of self".

3. Possible history of abuse
a) Neglect of emotional needs
b) Verbal Abuse (overt or covert)
c) Sexual Abuse

4. Early "rejection" of the opposite sex

5 . If a male Compulsive Overeater, possible over-identification with mother
a) Over-involved emotionally

6. Tendency towards "Social Anxiety"
a) Tend to isolate and use food as a "friend"
b) After social situations, relieve anxiety by bingeing or overeating

7. A history of "diet failures"

8 . Preference for food instead of other activities
a) Food is friend
b) Food is hobby

9. History of Guilt/Shame
a) Parents used guilt as a form of control
b) Life filled with "shoulds", "oughts", "always" and "nevers"

10. Possible other addictions
a) Sugar
b) Prescription Drugs
c) Alcohol
d) Sex

11. A long-term, unhappy marriage or other significant relationship
a) Food becomes a point of intimacy instead of spouse
b) Food to cope with conflict
c) Food to fill a void

12. Long-standing relationship difficulties
a) Avoidance of conflict

13. Difficulty dealing with Anger
a) Internalization of anger
b) Ends in resentment

14. "Loving Heart" has been damaged (hurt)
a) The compassionate heart is buried, though still present

15. Hunger for acceptance and love

Can we relate to one, two or all of these? That is where we get serious with ourselves.

Now these are also reasons for other things people 'become addicted' do; gambling, sex, prescription medications, food, pornography, sodas, drugs, bad relationships (oh yes, you can be addicted to those too), alcohol....the list is endless. All of these have been labelled as things we can be addicted to.

Just remember, when it is an addiction to shoes, nylon stockings or getting tied up - it's a fetish.
See the difference? Me neither. ;)

Remember a few key things when dealing with any feelings (not food disorders - those come after we can't deal with the feelings);

• Get enough rest and expand positive relationships.
• Take deep breaths, close your eyes, picture yourself in a field or at a beach. Turn on quiet
  music; any method of relaxation helps.
• Begin an enjoyable task or project immediately after eating a meal.
• Carry food to work rather than buying it there. Pack healthy, satisfying food.
• Call a friend who knows about your problem and have him/her just listen.
• Learn your triggers, learn your danger zones.
• Work on your perfectionism. It’s okay to not be perfect about every external matter.

Oh...........and as always - rock your day!

Food 'Disorders' - Why Do We Do It?

Food disorders. Before I even begin this post, those two very powerful words have already instilled some 'notions' in our minds to what we believe food disorders are all about.

The entire 'disorder' breakdown is vast....and tough to decipher. Let's just talk about me instead.....

There was a point in my life where I really, really thought I knew everything. Clearly (very, very clearly now) I was mistaken. I'm still working towards total enlightenment - and isn't that what complete and total knowledge would be?

I remember hearing the term 'food disorder' for the first time in my life. It terrified me - I was raised a huge fan of food and now we had to be scared of it? I wasn't signing up for that one!

I have known self & medically diagnosed bingers, anorexics, bulemics and compulsive eaters. Let me start by saying that these people are people too. There are no judgements here - only observations and a desire to learn.

All of these technical, medical names for food disorders fall into the category of 'issues with food.' When I examine it more closely though, it seems to me that food is only one small facet - a vehicle through the fire so to speak.....so where's the fire?

*Insert smoky fade to the past here.....*

When I was very young, I had no issue with food - I LOVED FOOD - I loved the crepes with strawberries my Nan used to make when we'd visit her - complete with whipped cream and bacon on the side.

My childhood nickname was 'bacon face' and I loved it.....bacon...and the name.

Food was equated with love for me - and I felt really, really loved! I was never hungry - and cheese whiz on white toast always felt like home. In my mind it always will, I just don't have to keep eating it.

Steaks on the BBQ, community town hall dinners bubbling with mashed potatoes and slabs of roast beast....... and pig roasts at family gatherings - the world was filled with delicious food!

As soon as I didn't want to eat it I would be asked, "Do you know there are starving children in Africa?"

I always wanted to reply, 'So send this to them....I don't like liver.'

I never understood that. I wanted to scream that I was full (or it was liver), so give it to a kid who is starving! It made sense to me! Hurry! Africa is a long way away......

I loved getting my driver's licence - fast food drive-thru's were amazing! The bright lights, the thrill of scanning the menus and then - the big payoff. Indigestion in thirty minutes or less.......only it wasn't free.

One day, I realized that 'the collective' human race was teaching me how I should look, think and act. The media did it's job well on me! What I was hearing - it didn't go side by side with the foods I liked at all. I now loved all of this stuff (all the deep fried badness in the world) and now I was being told not to.

I was disappointed - no, I was pissed off - and I became rebellious.

Unfortunately, the flashy colors and media ads had also rooted deep in my cranial areas, and I was still 'hooked on food'. I kept telling myself this and I kept making it so.

I rebelled against those who thought I should look a certain way, how I should view the world and what foods I should and should not eat. My spirit and mind were hurt so I punished my body too.

I didn't eat right unless I was forced to - and the older we get, the less we are made to eat what is best for us. We are expected to learn how to care for ourselves.

Inside, I was terrified to miss a glass of milk in a day because the Canada Food Guide was screaming at me that I needed it. I couldn't stand milk! Cheese - that I could manage - and I would eat all the cheesy pizza I could instead of balancing a meal like we're supposed to. I couldn't stomach coffee, but learned to incorporate ice cold soda into my diet ever single day - more than 12 times a day.

Yes, I think that is a disgusting number too. Cringe away. If you can stomach it, my trek to the path of wellness story can be found here. I'm not saying I'm proud - I'm saying it is a lesson learned and for that, yeah - I am damn proud.

I still never categorized myself as having a 'food disorder.' I would have called it 'some crap going on in my life so I ate good tasting stuff to feel better.'

We can all create reasons to carry the past through to our present and further into our future - but that has actual weight to it! Everyone has a past and I was no different. All of the accumulated 'stuff' in my life hadn't been dealt with. There was a lot - at least there was when I went to sort it all out.

We grow to understand ourselves.

I've done other things as an adult to feel better too; shopping, drinking, smoking, sex. I wouldn't label any of them as 'disorders.' I don't believe any one of them were the driving forces behind why I did any of them. They were outlets available to me at the time for dispersing feelings.

I had many, many usable excuses to fall into bad food habits - but that still wasn't it. I still loved the bad-for-me food. We are meant to love the bad food - it is created so we do. Companies rely on our inability to decipher this for ourselves. I'm not special - or so pathetic that I can never change. Monsanto isn't an issue in the news these days for nothing. The term GMO didn't exist when I started eating bad foods - I was told soda wouldn't hurt me if it was diet. Instinctively, I probably never bought that - but I used it as a reason to carry on doing what I was doing......enjoying ignorance.

Ignorance can get you places you don't want to be - we learn this through experience. I am so excited for life's full range of experiences!

Back to the food.....

What we call 'food' is not even close to what it used to be. We are deceived into believing our food store products can't harm us - and that's just ridiculous nowadays. We know better because we are becoming aware.

The real problem wasn't ONLY the food choices I was making - it was that I wasn't dealing with the real issues in my life - I wasn't learning to love myself so I was drowning the real me in a huge vat of unchanged grease in an attempt to kill her. The choices I was making were for my demise, not my rise! I had to learn to care about what was going on inside my head, put the distractions of the world's negativity aside and face myself head on. I used my rebelliousness against myself for far too many years. It was time to turn the tide. I learned to find the balance.

I used to think food was magical.

Now I know food is magical - because I now realize what real food is.

Rock your day!

Tomorrow: Food 'Disorders' - Why Do We Do It? Part II.